Jesus is the answer

WARNING: Be prepared to either A) Snicker, or B) Be offended. You have been warned.

I saw this bumper sticker today as the Hubby and I were coming back from me getting forced out of the house for the weekend, sick or not, so that I was -out of the house-. Of course, the first thing that came to mind is "Really? Jesus is -the- answer?" And of course, I said this out loud. I should probably point out my Hubs is semi-non-denominational-Christan. I am non-denominational-pagan. >.>

So he looks at me and says "Really? Not an answer, but -the- answer?" And I shrug and point to the bumper sticker on the car in line ahead of us at the light. Of course, my mouth run-ith over, and I continue. "I wish I would have known that back in high school. Would have made tests so much easier. just write down 'Jesus' for everything and I would have had a 4.0"

He snickered.

"Of course," I said, "Had I gotten something 'wrong' I could have politely pointed out 'But I've been told Jesus is the answer. Are you saying that Jesus is indeed, not the answer?"

He snickered again.

"What's worse is, had I actually failed a test after giving that answer, I suppose I could have then gone to the church officials and pointed out how wrong they are about Jesus being the answer. I mean, by then, Jesus would have fucked my GPA."

He howled in laughter and we almost missed the green light. So while he's trying to drive, I make matters worse by calling Mur and filling her in on the conversation, getting more snickers from the Hubby. And she pops off with, "But, if Jesus is the answer, what the hell is the question?"

The three of us then listed a ton of (offensive to many) questions and applied the "Jesus" answer.

1. Who was the world's first Hippie?-- Jesus.
2. Who shot JFK?-- Jesus
3. Who was History's most closeted Homosexual? -- Jesus.
4. Who killed 6,000 Jews in WW2?-- Jesus. (Apparently Hitler was framed, and Jesus wanted revenge.)

It kept going downhill from there, until the Hubby almost couldn't drive from laughing so hard, and rather than get into a car accident and be forced to answer the cop's "What the hell happened here?" with a "Jesus."... we decided to end the conversation.

See what kind of trouble bumper stickers can cause? Damn you all!! LOL.